Shake Ya Tailfeather...And Go To Jail?

"Sexually suggestive dancing" is now banned in Texas
Matt Harrison

The Texas Legislature has passed a bill proposed by one Representative Al Edwards that bans "sexually suggestive" dances performed by high school cheerleaders. As of yet, there is no indication that the male high school population of Texas is planning a massive protest, which might be a scathing indictment of America's 28th state.

Also, the distinction that the proposed legislation is in the Texas Legislature is slightly surprising, as one might naturally assume it would be a promulgation of Michael Powell as his Farewell To Indecency Tour passed through the Lone Star State.

Mr. Edwards said, "It's just too sexually oriented, you know, the way they're shaking their behinds and going on, breaking it down." Yes, it is sexually oriented. And for the purpose of the non-cheerleading fan (read: 98.9% of the individuals in the stands on Friday nights), sexual orientation is pretty much the only factor keeping them from the hot dog stand at halftime.

Mr. Edwards is a 26-year veteran of the Texas House, so his wagging index finger might have slipped off of the Zeitgeist a few decades ago. First, let's analyze what's going on in terms of culture. After that, let's determine whether this legislation is justifiable.

It's worth mention that cheerleading is, well, a sexually suggestive activity. Actually, there is a little more to it than that. It offers two distinct appeals: sexually suggestive entertainment and quasi-gymnastic action.

The former is what is promoted the most, especially at the professional level. NFL cheerleading squads annually produce swimsuit calendars to quench the nearly insatiable lust of male football fans. Their game outfits are highly suggestive, and the television cameras make sure that at least one of these hypermammiferous females (you realize that there are no ugly NFL cheerleaders) graces the high definition screen before a commercial break.

Is anyone (other than the Texas Legislature) not aware of this?

At the highest level of cheerleading, quasi-gymnastic talent is mostly an afterthought. Professional cheerleading is considered, for many women, a stepping-stone to modeling, acting, or other commodifications of their beauty.

If a high school cheerleader is to ignore this reality, she is to discard her chances of future success in the activity - just as a boxer were to do so if he was unaware that the purpose of boxing is to pummel one's opponent's skull with sufficient force to induce temporary brain damage.

It's not all peachy to think about, but we allow individuals to decide if it's for them or not.

Now, high school cheerleading, despite the Puritan objections of Mr. Edwards, is markedly less suggestive and less reliant upon beauty for attention as the professional version. Suggestivity comprises a clear minority of high school cheer activity. College serves as a middle ground between the two. As the women mature, they are more comfortable in their roles as sexual objects, and their responsibilities as cheerleaders reflect this.

In high school, cheerleading is a school sport, so the athletic aspect is emphasized. This tangentially serves to placate the boyfriends and fathers of these young women.

However, their athleticism is not sufficient for cheerleading to maintain the popularity among football fans it traditionally commands. They must be entertaining, in addition to being talented.

Cheerleading is not the only high school activity saddled with this duplicity. The marching band faces a similar situation. While they are not expected to be lascivious, they are expected to offer entertainment to appeal to the large percentage of football audiences who are ignorant to the nuances of their difficult musical harmonies and complex drill formations.

This is, quite simply, cultural reality.

Mr. Edwards continued, "And then we say to them, 'don't get involved in sex unless it's marriage or love, it's dangerous out there' and yet the teachers and directors are helping them go through those kind of gyrations."

Waal, as long as "we" means the Texas Legislature, such prohibitions are foreign to the scope of constitutionally justifiable legislation.

Beyond that, those like Mr. Edwards who lack the ability to ascertain cultural trends often, throughout American history, have misinterpreted them.

Last century, the bikini was the cynosure for moralist rage as many decried its promiscuous suggestivity. After that, the miniskirt was criticized along the same erroneous assumptions. Recently, it has been low-cut jeans paired with high-rise thongs.

Recall the constant inclusion, with these criticisms, of the argument that the employment of these fashions instigates a concerning and irreversible concatenation of events that end in daughters and sisters becoming indecent whores degrading their bodies - or something along those lines.

For Mr. Edwards, the inclusion is the assumption that sexual abstinence and dancing gyrations are effectively irreconcilable.

Why is it that the recognition of free choice evanesces every time suggestive behavior is put under the legislative microscope?

It must be unintelligible for Mr. Edwards to envision a cheerleader who happily participates in these "gyrations" and returns to her steady boyfriend afterward. The datum would shock him, but these gyrations exist everywhere in modern American society, and there is no point at which they become the initiation of a manic devolution into nymphomania.

Here are the free choices faced by the aspiring high school cheerleader. First, do I desire to perform in a sexually suggestive manner? Second, do I desire to engage in an activity whose professionals exist mostly as sexual objects, or will I quit before that point? Can I control myself in situations with men?

Free choice is the first principle to be discarded when this type of legislation is proposed. The choices of parents and high school girls are not the choices of Texas Representative Al Edwards, and the point should be stressed.

We do not cavil with the goals of Mr. Edwards. We do not wish for our daughters, sisters, and girlfriends to become wild sluts. However, we observe the grave errors of his means.

The above work is the opinion of the author, and not necessarily that of the Prometheus Institute.

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